So, in the last few days I've had to write three fairly impossible letters (two down, one to go).
1. CreativeWritingMentor from HighSchool, who is also a dear friend, the next door neighbor to my mother's house and the woman whose wedding I trespassed to get to in time is just entering second trimester of a difficult pregnancy (and her first): difficult decisions have had to be made, she is physically and emotionally totally exhausted, and the end isn't really anywhere in sight, the likelihood that she will lose the whole pregnancy is still fairly high. I love this woman and she has shown unfailing support for me in all of my endeavors: personal, political, intellectual, and creative. I wish that I had the write words to lift her up and support her from hundreds of miles away, but I'm at a loss. She is also a fairly private person and that makes things trickier especially because I got this update through my mother, who bless her heart, is a pregnancy gossip. On the other hand, I can't NOT write a note.
2. WomenStudiesMentor and mother of children who I babysat and adore was diagnosed with epilepsy this summer and continues to struggle with meds, seizures, and managing life and family with this evolving and changing disorder. I love this woman and she has shown unfailing support for me in all of my endeavors: personal, political, intellectual, and creative. When I go back to ELACtown in a couple of weeks, I'll probably stay with her and her family. It's a funny thing to try to be the friend of a former mentor. I definitely get the vibe that she wants me to be her friend -- but I feel like I'm flying by the seat of my pants in that friendship more than I do in most. Probably because I hang on to boundaries that aren't there anymore. I just wrote her an email pinning down details of my stay (and checking *one more time* that I'm not imposing).
3. HistoryActivismMentor is applying to a tenure track position at the school where her partner teaches and has asked me to write her a recommendation letter. I love this woman and she has shown unfailing support for me in all of my endeavors: personal, political, intellectual, and creative (are you sensing a theme?). The department that she is applying is has asked me to evaluate her skills as a teacher. HOLY SHIT! I told my sister, who was also HAM's student that I was doing this, she agreed that it was an impossible task and we decided the letter could go something like this:
"When I was a freshman HAM taught me what gender was. Then she taught me what history was. Then she treated me like a fellow scholar. Then she taught me about campus politics, myself, housesitting for her adorable cats, being a bitch to get out of being overcommitted, and gender. I still don't think I'm done thinking about everything that HAM taught me. If you don't give her this position you are damn fools, but I'll be happy because she will still be on the East Coast."
In closing:
GAH. Does anyone know how to write this kind of letter?
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3 comments:
I had a letter somewhat like #3 to write...i wish i could offer advice, but i think i screwed it up pretty strongly.
Oh, man... I don't envy you Corinne, EXCEPT in the fact that, wow, you have really been lucky in the mentor department! I don't think I've ever had a mentor, which is probably due to a lot of factors, not the least of which is my inability to let anyone help me.
My only advice is to start where you clearly have: Use the mission of writing the letters as an opportunity to explore your own feelings about these loaded and transforming relationships. My opinion is that you're halfway there already by understanding how you feel and what's at stake. The rest, I'm confident, will follow.
And I like the HAM letter just like it is! :)
Good luck! You can do it!
That's a great deal on the plate there.
As someone who has sat on a couple of faculty hiring committees, I feel only a little bit free in offering advice on unfinished letter #3:
1) Relax. In the big picture of hiring/rank portfolio, sadly, student recommendations tend not to get much attention (sadly, this is true on tenure committees as well -- unless there are other complicating issues but that is another matter). Just speak freely, and speak the truth.
2) There are some odd things that many departments look at, that CAN tip a balance (assuming equal credentials and equal teaching evals and colleague recommendations): more and more, colleges/universities are looking at issues such as retention, workforce/development, and real-world experience (just to name a few) as points of interest or distinction in the faculty hiring process. I'd ask if said college has any institution-wise initiatives that are getting administrative "buzz", and COYLY (NOT overtly) tie that into the recommendation as well.
I know that sounds cheesy, but that is the academy.
Your letter is really quite exceptional as is. You obviously care muchly for this mentor. It is what makes the life of the mind, and the work of the academic, so worthwhile
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